Hey You!
I'm Peaches: aunt, artist, wannabe photographer, expert city dweller, World Class Diet Coke Connoisseur. My hands are always moving. My toenails are tangerine. I’m excellent at procrastinating. I guarantee you, at the time you are reading this, there are dirty dishes in my sink. I didn’t get my driver’s license until a was twenty-nine. Did I mention it was my third attempt?
I'm sort of like that chubby friend everyone knows; you like me because I know how to order cocktails and make you look skinny by comparison, and, I like you because your family/office/personal/Mother-In-Law/Baby-Daddy drama makes my life feel normal. Damn, we are so good together.
My days are spent in an office getting paid to have people tell me do lots of things, most of which translate to "make it pretty." My nights are spent working as a freelance graphic designer, attempting to validate the time and money I wasted on a pretentious art school.
This is what you should to know about me:
- I don't like being lectured to.
- I have no interest in being right.
- I am suspicious of women who feel compelled to tell me everything they have eaten in the last 24 hours, and men who use cell phones in restaurants.
- I look terrific in leopard.
- I do a great impersonation of Cher singing "Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves" without a lick of irony.
- I am in the business of being awesome.
Welcome to my blog.
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| Flashing gang signs in my bad-ass Easter bonnet. |
Frequently Asked Questions
Can I send you free stuff so you can promote it?
Probably not. Best send it to someone else. I have very weird taste, and lest you are in the business of producing Liberace gear or sloth art, I'm probably not interested.
Can I link to one of your projects?
Yes, I would be delighted if you linked to one of my projects or posts. Feel free to use one of my images and a brief excerpt, as long as it is credited to "Aunt Peaches" along with a direct link. Thank you in advance for your interest – I appreciate it more than you know! And no, you don't have to ask me first, but you are welcome to send me an email with a link. I might tweet it or something. You never know.
Can I repost or copy one of your tutorials? I promise to link back and fiddle with the words enough to really "make it my own."
That's fine by me, just be sure to send me your address. Expect my invoice to follow shortly thereafter.
Where did the name Aunt Peaches come from? What is your real name?
Long story short but not-that-short: My family has called me Peaches for ages and I was proud to become Aunt Peaches when my niece was born in 2009. In fact, I was so proud, I used "Aunt Peaches 2009" as my login name when commenting on blogs and websites, including a couple which asked me to write contributor posts in 2010, which eventually sparked a conversation about "Aunt Peaches' blog", which eventually morphed into calling the blog AuntPeaches.com. Then I bought the domain and that was that. Back then I assumed my real name would take over with time but a few months after I started the blog, one of my posts went on a super-weird-mini-viral-rampage in Central Asia and I received hundreds of scary, threatening emails. As you can imagine, things would have been even scarier if my real name had been widely available, so, since then, I have made every effort to keep it private. I hope you understand.
Wow, that was long.
What can I do to dye my coffee filters _(insert bridesmaid color here)__?
Easy Answer 1: Click here. Easy Answer 2: Get a stack of 50 filters, run them under water, squish out water, add acrylic paint, squish out more water, add paint, squish out more water, and repeat til they look how you want them. People ask me for specific dye recipes but I have long given up – every coffee filter brand contains a different level of starch or something that effects the rate of absorption. You will just have to try yourself. It's easier than you think, I promise.
Where did you learn to make stuff?
Too many sources to name here. I try to cite my essential source(s) of inspiration for each project with each post, although sometimes ideas just come as the result of living and working around creative people. I was lucky to have grown up with gobs of creative role models – women in particular. My mother died when I was pretty young, and as the result, her friends/family/neighbors were always teaching me to do the things they thought I would miss without a mother around; cooking, crafts, dancing, napkin folding, and various lessons in the "domestic arts" (Ickkk. Isn't that a creepy term?). Each "Aunt" infused me with a different skill. I go into this a bit more in this post about Aunt Dooney.
What sort of cat is Lola?
Not sure. Lola was adopted from The Treehouse in May 2008, fully grown, bustin' out fur and attitude. I'm pretty sure she is related to Tyra Banks.
Why did you use a bad word in that post? Shucks, now I can't share it with my Pastor.
This blog is my personal sandbox. I write things down the same as they would fall out of my mouth, which, occasionally, may include some words that other people find offensive. My opinion of what qualifies as "profane" might be different than yours. I won't hold it against you if you don't hold it against me.
I spotted a typo. Will you get offended if I let you know?
Goodness no. Please, by all means, let me know. Most of my posts are written ridiculously early in the morning, and even with proofreading later in the day, I don't always catch my mistakes. Everyone can benefit from an editor. In situations like this, you are doing me a favor.
Can you write a post on __(this random thing that I am really interested in)___?
Maybe. Why not? If you think this is something that might be up my alley, and a number of people would be interested in it, send me an email. I'm not promising anyone I will write a post, but I will promise to keep it in my brain for a while and see what sticks. You never know.
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