Every year around this time, I make a list of 20 things I want to accomplish in course of summer, and, of course, I usually complete about 10. Yes sir, overachiever, right here!
There is one item that has been on my list since 2004 and has never reached the summit: Reupholstering.
I have two side chairs that came to me 100% free and 200% ugly. Both are arm chairs, great lines, groan-inducing comfortable. Since paying someone else to reupholster is just about as expensive as purchasing new chairs, I have waffled between the two options for years, making up the difference in decorative throw blankets. I have now concluded that this is the summer, THIS SUMMER, Lord willing and the creek don’t rise, I am going to reupholster them myself. If it doesn’t work out, so be it, I can say I tried and won’t feel guilty for buying a new one.
Before I embark on this epic journey with my trusty steed, Thy Staple Gun, I decided to break in my upholstery skills with some basic projects. Namely, chair covers.
Weekend Project 1: The Jefferson Chair
I bought this corner chair at the Salvation Army for $13. It reminds me of one I saw at Monticello so I dubbed it the Jefferson chair. It looks weird but it’s insanely comfortable. It has straight lines and a small footprint like a dining chair, but the arm rests are made in a way that allows for lounging like an arm chair. Plus, this ain’t something you can buy at Home Goods, you know? Initially I thought I would refinish it but when I took it apart I could see that this was not a professional piece but someone’s garage born wood working project. Even better! It’s hella sturdy and I love it as is, wood glue warts and all. Just a light cleaning and linseed oil was all it needed. The cushion though, needed some work. I have a weird fetish for pine and polka dots (don’t ask), so this black and white thing just needed to happen. I am addicted to well-balanced yet non-symmetrical polka dots (again, don’t ask).
Weekend Project 2: Kiki’s Dining Room Chairs
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| This one has been in the works for over a year. Shows you my profound talent for procrastination! |
My friend Kiki inherited the most gorgeous dining table for her Grandma Lucile (yes, the same Grandma Lucile of Beer Can Alligator fame). The table is the perfect size and shape for her dining room and comfortably seats 8 people without even adding a leaf. The wood is in near-perfect condition but the chairs, oh my, were covered in double laminated pus-colored oil cloth. The bumpy kind. Not cute. Luckily, a year ago, my friend Ann sent me a giant box of fabric, including this gorgeous floral and paisley one. Not only do the colors pick up the wood grain and look great in the room, the fabric is hefty enough to hold up to spot cleaning (if needed) and light weight enough that I could stretch it over the seats nice and tight. Also, and this is most important, Kiki’s kitty Tzeitel looks really good on them.
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| “Thanks Ann!” –Tzeitel |
Problem with doing a big set of dining chairs is you get a bit sloppy half way through. By the time I got to chair #4 I miscalculated the staple position and it ricocheted off the table and into my eye. “BLACKHAWK DOWN,” I cried to no one in particular, “BLACKHAWK DOWN!”
Turns out the staple got caught on my eyelashes. My big honking, dipped-in-tar style mascara lashes saved my life. Okay, not my life, they saved my eye. But the lesson is to always wear mascara AND safety goggles. Or if you don’t have safety goggles (like, ahem, me) at least wear sunglasses. Even if it’s indoors. You will look like an asshat, but better a two eyed asshat than a one eyed idiot.
You can’t get that kind of wisdom in a book, y’all.
I’m still nervous about taking on the arms chairs, but I will suck it up and have some courage. If by chance anyone in the Chicago area has experience with an upholsterer at a good price, leave their name and # in the comments, wouldya?
And for everyone who wants to try at home, this is a nice one.
Next warm up: Lampshades. Get excited people!
Its a pretty big rumor/known deal that prisons re-upholster for the charge of the material only (labor, done by the prisoners is free). Its a way for prisons to teach work skills. If inclined, you might want to call some around you.
Hmmm….. I’ll have to look into that. There isn’t a prison for over 100 miles around here (local jails w no inmate programs, sadly). But that is worth investigating. Thanks!
What color is puss? I thought you meant puss like pussy cat or a face in a 1930’s movie , but you mean puss like puss coming out of a wound, greeny yellowed? Are these homonyms? I still love that brownish, turquoise linen. Find out who teaches upholstering near you and take a course. You will love it for life! Really. Usually your local public high school or town will have a continuing education course on it. Also, get a book from the library or a video.
If you find a good re-upholstererererer in Chicago, please share deets…I have a feeling my dining chair project may not end so well…
i don’t like symmetrical polka dots either. love the black and white fabric with that wooden one-of-a-kind chair!
I seriously LOVE your writing style. hilarious!
Thank goodness for mascara, it hasn’t saved my eye before but it has ensured I’ve gotten out of a few speeding tickets.
Yours is the only blog I make time to read. You never fail to make me laugh. Puss colored fabric…eww but funny as hell, and the staple gun incident….yikes but also funny in the tale you spin. Best of luck on your upholstery adventures this summer. I personally suck at it.
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So glad your eye is ok (how much mascara are we talking about? are you single-handedly keeping the mascara company in business?) Maybe you could embellish your NEW Safety Goggles with beautiful fake eyelashes!
I looked at the Design Sponge link – and didja notice the FIRST thing on their list of supplies is goggles – ya know SAFETY goggles.
You know it’s all fun & games until someone loses an eye. Then you’d have puss coming out of your eye socket. Be careful Peaches 🙂 Love ya!
Love the idea about embellishing the safety goggles, as long as you can see through them just fine – they may need some eyelashes like Mr Giraffe, ya know?? I’m a little OCD about safety goggles since my dad lost one eye to a wood accident. I wear them alot when I work outside. In fact, I was using bleach earlier today and forgot them and almost freaked out while I was cleaning!!
Love the Jefferson Chair – it does look comfy and like a lounge chair. You make me laugh while I read you. Keep the stories coming.
You are off to a great start. Don’t wimp out now! Plus, if it doesn’t work out, it still makes a good story for the blog.
You’re lucky the staple didn’t get in your eye and cause it to get infected and ooze pus– it’s pus, not puss 🙂 Safety googles are pretty cheap– I got a pair to fit over my glasses for $2.50– you would think with your level of extreme crafting they’d be a standard part of your supplies.
I have a $1 old dining room chair I use as a desk chair with a horrible ripped and duct-taped vinyl seat that I really want to reupholster, but first I need to find the perfect fabric. And maybe I should tackle painting my kitchen chairs first while my cat is visiting my parents for the summer and I won’t end up with painted cat tracks all over my apartment.
Your jefferson chair is actually a sword chair. As in, designed with one arm missing so you can sit in it without taking off your belt-hung scabbard. =) It’s one of my favorite styles.
Re: upholsterers, I used the auction part of Etsy, and got a geat price. Caveat, I had to drive it out to Ohio, but I have family out there, so it worked
That floral/paisley fabric you reupholstered the dining rooms chairs in is gorgeous! So nice with the color of the wood.
Good luck with the arm chairs!
It’s Rudyard Kipling’s chair! It’s at the end of a long list of (very interesting) photos of artist’s studios.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/summeranne/40-inspiring-workspaces-of-the-famously-creative?utm_source=buffer&utm_campaign=Buffer&utm_content=buffer1261a&utm_medium=twitter
Oh, interesting! Thanks!