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Last weekend I went on a spot binge. The prior weekend it was a gold spray paint binge. I’m not sure what comes next, but it might involve plaid. Watch out y’all, this is exciting.

It all started with this thing.

I decided that I needed some hooks in the bedroom. Instead of installing some hooks in the back of the door, or buying a $5 key rack like a normal person, I decided to convert a cheapo thrift store painting by painting it up all black and white then screwing hooks along the bottom. Easy enough. Good news is it looks alright in the room. Bad news is I feel uncomfortable hanging things on a piece of art, which was the whole purpose of this undertaking in the first place. I tell myself, It’s not art. It’s a key rack. A giant spotted key rack. It cost less than a $5 key rack because you were too cheap and lazy to go to the store to buy a $5 key rack. Get over yourself and hang that damn towel.

The towel is still on the floor.

Then, I was looking at it and I thought, Those spots look lonely. And dark. This white-on-black things needs some black-on-white. Dalmatian style!

 I didn’t even notice the spots on that green pillow until I was editing the photo here. Also! More spots in the edges of those awesome floral pillows, a gift from Kelly, creator of the Pippi Longstocking Flamingo. This is my first time sleeping on custom, one-of-a-kind pillows. Let me tell you, it’s a good thing.

And then, just because I was wearing my extra special painting pants, I went to town on this frame.

Not pictured: Another black and white dalmatian painting, a ceramic pot, a botched lampshade, and the beginnings of some curtains.

I’m hoping my plaid phase kicks in soon. 

How is it already Friday?

This weekend snuck up fast. Before you know it November will be here and… 

Oh crap!

Any plans this weekend?

I am going bowling. For work. Bowling on the job. This wouldn’t be a big deal if not for the fact that I have never been bowling before. Not once. What little I know about bowling comes from whatever I picked up on The Flinstones, and something tells me this bowling alley will not offer a baby dinosaur at the end of each lane (note to self: potential business opportunity!)

Happy weekend. 

I had big plans to dress Lola as a flamingo for Halloween, but I pulled back for fear it would upset the stitches on her stomach (…long story. I’ll save you the unpleasant details, but rest assured, she is doing great now).

Still, never one to be outdone, Lola had to make a grand appearance.

…and what could be more grand the MGM Lion?

Man, and I thought Cher was a diva.

And, actually, a movie themed costume is actually pretty perfect. I think of movies in conjunction with Halloween the same way I think of turkey in conjunction with Thanksgiving – they just go together. Last night I watched Scream. The original, 1996 version. It’s not bad. It probably would have been even better had I not let myself get distracted by the nostalgia of landline telephones and cube shaped televisions. Ahh, the good ol’ days.

If you are looking for a scary (or not-so scary) movie tonight, be sure to check out this list assembled by my pal Michelle L last year. Some serious niftyness going on up in there.

And for those who will not have time to watch a scary movie today, Lola offers you this short film from Henri, L’Haunting. After all, what could be more frightening than existential crisis?     

Happy Halloween!

Guess who went to Target last night and spent less than $7.00?

This gal.

If anyone needs any financial advice or suggestions on how to combat the national debt, you find me being useful on the facebooks, probably taking Buzzfeed quizzes and gawking at other people’s babies.

Eat your heart out, Allen Greenspan.

Sometimes I’ll brag to people that I was an early Google adopter. Yep, while everyone else was hanging out Alta Vista and Yahoo, or god forbid, Ask Jeeves, the Ol’ Goog and I were partying like it was 1999.

Oh wait.  It was 1999.

My guess is I have googled something at least five times a day every day since then. By conservative estimate, that puts me somewhere around 26,000 Google searches.

TWENTY SIX THOUSAND.

Twenty six thousand and not once did anyone tell me how to run a related query with a colon.

The hell? Goog, how could you hold back on me like this? I thought we were friends?

It’s been a rough week. First, I ran out of peanut butter for my peanut butter and celery snack. Then, my Best of Hall & Oates album disappeared from my ITunes. Not even like one song guys, the whole album! Obviously, I sent as outraged email to the head of Apple IN ALL CAPS I MIGHT ADD and then he responded back saying they had no record of it and I’d have to buy another one for $8.95. Can you even believe this devil trash?

First it’s my Hall & Oates, next week it’s the laughter of children.

You know Obama is behind this.

In light of this ominous thunder cloud of injustice, I need a distraction. Normally I’d turn to chocolate but Mr. Choco is gone too. Probably out back mattress dancing with the peanut butter, no doubt. That jerk. I’ll have to get distracted some other way. Ahem:

Did you know that October 5 is National Thank a Teacher Day? …and you just know Hug a Cat Lady Day can’t be far behind. Progress, people!

Speaking of educating kids, why is Samuel L. Jackson yelling at a bunch of parents in a liquor store?

This is why Jesus doesn’t shop at Hobby Lobby. (Note, that link is satire, sorta, but a lot of us aren’t Hobby Lobby fans either).

Did you know there is a one-eyed pirate dog named Yoghurt with an instagram feed? Arrrr me hearty! (that’s pirate speak, beeteedubs)

On Thursday I saw a women ride a scooter out of an elevator and into an office lobby. No link here, I just thought it was rad enough to share.

Maegan wrote about kids born in the worst circumstance, and a network of people doing something amazing to help. Special shout out on this one to folks in the medical profession.

Librarian friends, this is a great idea. And it changes every month. Nobody throws down community building like the hommies in Oak Park.

And finally, this is a surprisingly accurate portrayal of what would happen if congress got stuff done like roommates. My fav line: “We have a chore wheel for a reason!”

Are you still here? You are not easily distracted. Dang!

Well, I GTG. Gotta buy peanut butter and glitter a skull. If you have an especially distraction-worthy link to share, put it in the comments.

Happy weekend!

I’m taking my sweet time coming back from vacation. It’s been a long, long time since I have taken a real no-other-purpose-but-having-fun vacation, and it’ll take me a minute to get back in gear.

One day I will look back and think, Remember that time we ate our way through Europe?

Yeah. That did not suck.

Switzerland has been good to me, as it always has been. To me, to everyone. When she isn’t blowing your mind with awe-inspiring beauty, she’s stuffing your face with cheese and chocolate. She’s sort of like your great aunt, the rich and eccentric one, who likes to be on time.

I’m missing her already.

Y’all, I’m taking a few days off from the blog here to go on vacation.

Actually, I already went on vacation, and am on vacation as you ready this, I’m just a tricky one a scheduled a few posts ahead. Ahaha! That’s me, Trickster McGee.

I’ll be back later next week to talk about chocolate and the cat circus, but in the meantime, if you are interested, you can follow along in pictures from Instagram.

Hugs!