Missing: Yolanda the Sassy Unicorn

What did I come across duct taped to a tree on my walk home yesterday?

A flier* for a missing unicorn named Yolanda. Apparently she is a sassy thing with a love of room-temperature pigs in a blanket.

Guys, it isn’t everyday that a community loses a unicorn; let us unite together in this time of crisis. 

If you see Yolanda, call the number above!

* I could not make this up if I tried.


  1. Denice says

    I am so loving the love for Yolanda. I sure wish I lived in a neighborhood with a missing unicorn. And now for a unicorn poem (because I can)…

    The Unicorn
    ~ Sheldon Allan Silverstein

    A long time ago, when the earth was green
    and there was more kinds of animals than you’ve ever seen,
    and they run around free while the world was bein’ born,
    and the lovliest of all was the Unicorn.

    There was green alligators and long-neck geese.
    There was humpy bumpy camels and chimpanzees.
    There was catsandratsandelephants, but sure as you’re born
    the lovliest of all was the Unicorn.

    But the Lord seen some sinnin’, and it caused him pain.
    He says, ‘Stand back, I’m gonna make it rain.’
    He says, ‘Hey Brother Noah, I’ll tell ya whatcha do.
    Go and build me a floatin’ zoo.

    And you take two alligators and a couple of geese,
    two humpy bumpy camels and two chimpanzees.
    Take two catsandratsandelephants, but sure as you’re born,
    Noah, don’t you forget my Unicorn.’

    Now Noah was there, he answered the callin’
    and he finished up the ark just as the rain was fallin’.
    He marched in the animals two by two,
    and he called out as they went through,

    ‘Hey Lord, I got your two alligators and your couple of geese,
    your humpy bumpy camels and your chimpanzees.
    Got your catsandratsandelephants – but Lord, I’m so forlorn
    ’cause I just don’t see no Unicorn.’

    Ol’ Noah looked out through the drivin’ rain
    but the Unicorns were hidin’, playin’ silly games.
    They were kickin’ and splashin’ in the misty morn,
    oh them silly Unicorn.

    The the goat started goatin’, and the snake started snakin’,
    the elephant started elephantin’, and the boat started shaking’.
    The mouse started squeakin’, and the lion started roarin’,
    and everyone’s abourd but the Unicorn.

    I mean the green alligators and the long-neck geese,
    the humpy bumpy camels and the chimpanzees.
    Noah cried, ‘Close the door ’cause the rain is pourin’ –
    and we just can’t wait for them Unicorn.’

    Then the ark started movin’, and it drifted with the tide,
    and the Unicorns looked up from the rock and cried.
    And the water come up and sort of floated them away –
    that’s why you’ve never seen a Unicorn to this day.

    You’ll see a lot of alligators and a whole mess of geese.
    You’ll see humpy bumpy camels and lots of chimpanzees.
    You’ll see catsandratsandelephants, but sure as you’re born
    you’re never gonna see no Unicorn

    You’re welcome♥

  2. tracylee says

    Now I reaaaallly want to do something like that in my neighborhood 😀

    hmmm I think I have a Saturday project!

  3. tracylee says

    Hah! You just made me flash back to Sunday School 🙂 thanks for that!

  4. nutbirds says

    Somehow I think that’s the kind of thing YOU would do. In a week put up one that said she eloped with a fella and doesn’t want to be found.


  1. […] boasts some pretty big name alumni, including these weird kids who once plastered my street with fliers for a missing unicorn named Yolanda. You should totally come hang […]

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