Thus far, I have spent half my day on the phone, on hold, with customer service. I’ll spare you the details. Sufficient to say, I may have used the term “assneck” on more than one occasion. Anyway. When I’m on hold in situations like that I like to play this game my mom taught me, Ying Yang. I don’t think she made it up but I don’t know anyone else who plays it. It’s oddly calming. Good for squirmy children and irritated adults.
The crux of it is this; you say one thing you find unappealing and the other person has to come up with something to make that first thing splendid. Or a splendid combination, I should say. For example I say “ketchup” because ketchup is the devil (THAT IS FACT) and then the other person says “meatloaf” because ketchup is actually pretty almost-good on meatloaf. If a third person in the room agrees they say “Ying Yang!” and the game starts again. The trick is to offer up something unappealing, not something you hate. I mean, there is no Ying Yang for genocide. If you know the other person’s pet peeves, it’s a good opportunity to force them into a new outlook (like I said — it’s a good game for when you are frustrated).
Now, I don’t have two other people to converse with while waiting for customer service, so I just write them down for no other reason than it keeps me occupied. As of ten minutes ago (I’m still on hold) this is what’s scribbled on my notepad…
dentist offices and unicorns
instant coffee and pink marshmallows
instant coffee and pink marshmallows
thyme and cinnamon
Sonny and Cher
tuxedos and tacos
aviator sunglasses and cats (EPIC WINNING)
denim shorts and vintage tiaras
moss green and carnation pink
Spock and John Lennon
cloves and basil
bacon and chocolate (this one may not get points on the unlikeable spectrum)
pretzels and ice cream (see above)
Tabasco sauce and bananas
nursing scrubs and feather boas
olives and white chocolate
teal and espresso brown
pretzels and ice cream (see above)
Tabasco sauce and bananas
nursing scrubs and feather boas
olives and white chocolate
teal and espresso brown
chalkboards and cut velvet
granny floral and yachting stripes
mushroom and apricot
Nancy Reagan and Mr. T (this is still my favorite!)
mushroom and apricot
Nancy Reagan and Mr. T (this is still my favorite!)
Hulk Hogan and Liberace
dragons and french poodles
pointy shoes and camouflage
hairless cats and cashmere sweaters
…. and I’m still on hold. If you think of any good combos, holler!
I’m confused…you don’t like bacon or dragons? ….HOW?
Yeah, the bacon snuck in under the opposites theme. The dragons not so much. I think I was thinking of a bad dragon tattoo I saw recently. It would be improved upon if someone sandwiched it in between poodle tattoos.
Wonderful game! How about SUVs and thrift shopping?
Exactly. I never liked SUVs until I went thrift shopping in one. Game changer….
Bacon and chocolate! Pretzels and ice cream! These are totally acceptable and awesome snacks! (It’s that “salty-n-sweet” thing.) Chocolate-covered bacon is one of the greatest inventions in the universe.
How about…Monday mornings and donuts with sprinkles? Life is instantly better.
Love it! The best way to start a monday 🙂
Lima beans and the smell of rain on pavement.
Grocery shopping and making art.
Money worries and big fat dog kisses.
Last but not least, work and reading your blog. Which by the way always turns a frown upside down. Thank you for that. 🙂
🙂
I always get the grumblies when Summer starts to turn Autumn-y (Autumn really is just as amazing as Summer, but I’m never quite ready for it). I played this game (with myself) and it made me much more reconciled to the whole thing! Thanks Peaches!
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