Did you know that ice cream tastes better on a pink spoon?
Well it does.
I have been collecting miniature rainbow spoons in a baby food jar for years with the specific intention of pairing them with certain foods; pink spoons = ice cream, green spoons = peanut butter, yellow spoons = yoghurt…and so on. Sadly, it would appear that purple spoons do not go well with anything.
Sorry purple spoons.
If I had to guess, I would say 30% of the people I know have a room in their house with a big empty wall.
And not empty like Let’s Embrace Our Buddhist Calm Space empty, I mean empty like Dude Don’t Distract From My Totally Awesome Big-As-A-Car Television With That Thing You Bought At Marshall’s empty.
Back when we all had square TV’s we would put them in entertainment centers or sandwich them between bookshelves, but now that flat screens are all the rage, they usually end up sitting on a narrow credenza on the largest wall in the room. You probably know somebody with a similar set up. Let me guess, it looked like this:
The TV above belongs to Kiki, who would like to everyone who read last Friday’s post to know “I DID NOT REJECT YOUR PURSE. TELL THEM I AM A NICE PERSON. TELL THEM!!” …which I can confirm: Kiki is a nice person. She just prefers boring purses. Thank goodness she does not feel the same way about her walls (or this post would be really boring).
So, Kiki wanted to snazz her TV situation but couldn’t find the right fit. Big art just competed with the screen and little art just looked too dinky next to machinery and heavy wooden credenza. It wasn’t a good choice for an accent paint wall, and wallpaper was out of the question….
So we went to Paper Source. Found a couple of sheets of Japanese wrapping paper and put them in them in two simple Ikea frames laying around the house. It looked like this:
Dinky. Nice, but still not big enough to balance the heavy TV and the giant expanse of empty wall around it. So we went back to Paper Source, found the most awesome floral gift wrap ever, and back to Ikea for more frames. Then we got to work:
If you are the fancy type, I would suggest using spray adhesive and an exacto knife to adhere each piece of wrapping paper to the cardboard, making sure the pattern seams match between each frame. But since neither Kiki or I are fancy, we just folded each piece and slapped on some masking tape. This ain’t rocket science.
Originally, we planned on hanging these with 2″ gap between the frames creating more of a grid. That idea was ditched because some of the frames were slightly warped –not enough to notice on their own, but to stick out like a sore thumb in a grid formation. Also, if you are doing this project, I suggest hammering right through the frame as to avoid any wiggle room that comes with using picture wire.
Be sure to use a level, especially if you are using cheapo frames with wonky/warped edges. You will be staring at this wall every time you watch TV –if these are not hung straight, you will notice the imperfections every single time you look at that wall. This process will require some patience. I suggest working along to a movie that will periodically demand your attention in ways that will require frequent breaks. Tonight at the cinema: Brigadoon.
And that’s it. Now stand back and admire your work!
Who would have thunk a few cheapo frames and some wrapping paper would make such a big difference?
Yentl, Kiki’s cat, who has very discerning taste, offered her seal of approval. Thanks, Yenni 🙂
PS: On the topic of home decor –any Apartment Therapy folks out there? Apparently I am up for the 2012 Homies. Take a second and vote for me, wouldya? And while you are over there, click around and see what other folks are doing –I just found ten new blogs to follow. Cool beans!
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| sources left to right: washing machine | elle fanning | nails | shoes | tape | rainbow pillow | satchel | peach curtains | plate | genifer goodman sohr | vintage photo My first grade teacher, Miss DeMoulpied, was beautiful. Stunning I would say. She had big and bouncy Miss America hair with a waxy rhubarb smile that enveloped half of her face. Each morning, her classroom commenced with her at the piano while leading the group in a patriotic song, displaying the sort of enthusiastic showmanship one might expect from a professional cheerleader, or worse, a giant faux-fur mascot. With her elbows wide and flailing, we followed her lead and marched in place at our desks.
You’re a grand ol’ flag! You’re a high flying flag! And forever in peace may you wave! Miss DeMoulpied was also short tempered, insecure, overly-flirtatious with our fathers, and far too-fond of Jessica McClintock perfume. I know that was her scent because one time she took it out of her purse and spritzed it on Matthew Hendrick’s tongue when he refused to quit eating his own boogers. They are mine! You can’t have them! I’LL EAT THEM IF I WANT TO! Sigh. I loved her more than words can say. Of all her charming idiosyncrasies, most notable was Ms. DuCharm’s fondness for polka dots. It was her signature. Not a day passed when she did not sport a polka dot sweater, pant set or coffee mug. Even her pencils had polka dots. Decades later, every time I see a polka dotted something-er-other, I sniff the object in hopes it will carry the unmistakable, powdery aristocracy of Jessica McClintock Eau de Parfum. I’m still searching.  Polka dots have never gone out of fashion, but it appears they are coming into fashion in a big way. Patterns never die but they certainly come in cresting waves of popularity: a few years ago it was ikat, then it was ombre, then it was chevron, now I think it might be polka dots. Or at least I hope so.
There are different sorts of polka dots though. Not just any sort of polka dot will do. My favorite dots are small white polka dots on a dark background, or, what I call wonky dots–evenly spaced dots that appear to be slightly scattered off the grid. They look less perfect. A little nervous. Maybe even, dare I say, unstable. But that’s just me, I always like the crazy one. What’s your favorite sort of polka dot? |
My boyfriend, Ira Glass, is the nerdy dream host of NPR’s This American Life, which is pretty much the best hour of broadcast you will find any given week (no offense, Downton Abbey).
He doesn’t know he is my boyfriend yet, and I think he might be married, and I sort of doubt he is into women who are the human equivalent of Miss Piggy, but that’s ok. I can wait. I’m cool like that.
Anyway, as I was saying, my boyfriend, Ira, is giving out some great advice on creativity. These snippets are called “Ira Glass on Storytelling” but I think his words apply to something much broader than writing stories for the radio. Anyone who is looking to improve their creative abilities, or improve themselves through creativity, could benefit from his advice, which is, in short: stick to it.
The one below is a particular favorite of mine as it pertains to relationship between good taste and good work. Newsflash: they are not the same thing.
It’s five minutes well spent. So here is my dude. Don’t slobber, y’all.
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| Pooh was hand sewn by a family friend as a gift to my mother at her baby shower, along with all the other characters from the 100 Acre Wood. She said she ran out of stuffing after finishing Piglett and resorted to stuffing the rest with the cushion of an old chair, which you can see through the fabric of Pooh’s right abdomen. |
“Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”
“Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit.
“Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.”
“Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, “or bit by bit?”
“It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”
I spent a day in Nashville this weekend and I am feeling seriously outspangled. Seems like everyone in Nashville is either wildly talented and/or has great hair. Some of them yodel. Many of them wear rhinestones. It is glorious.
Saturday night we to the Grand Ole Opry (check mark on the bucket list) and saw a series of wonderful performers, including a grown man playing a guitar bedazzled with sparkling alligators. Soon as I get back to Chicago I am singing up for lessons. I need that guitar.
Look, I know a lot of people who take the ABC approach to music (Anything But Country) and that’s fine. To each his own. But I happen like country music quite a lot. And I like country music performers even more. Perhaps it is their friendly attitudes and approachable smiles. Perhaps it is the sincerity that comes with writing many of their own songs. Perhaps it is the hair. Perhaps it is the rhinestones.
Oh, who am I kidding?
To any of you ABC music people out there who resist the siren call of the steel guitar, I dare you to watch one of my favorite films, Rhinestone (1984). Starring Sylvester Stallone and Dolly Parton, this cinematic tour-de-force is sure to stir the soul and imprint an appreciation for country music. I’m serious. Listen closely and one can hear the crunch of Stallone’s New York machismo under the sparkling heft of Bob Mackie western wear. It is nothing short of magnificent.
Here, lets take a look.
Be sure to stick around to 1:50 when Dolly jumps in for a duet that rivals Islands in the Stream any day.
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I’m prety sure my family thinks I’m trying to turn my 2-year-old niece Abigail into a drag queen. First I tried to dress her as Priscilla Queen of the Dessert style flamingo , now I’m making disco balls out of her favorite Sesame Street character, Elmo.
Now, I should say, I’m normally too stuck up to make things with characters on them… but seeing as he is Abigail’s favorite, and he is sort of a Muppet, I’ll make an exception for Elmo. Plus, the little dude is starting to grow on me. Have you seen this?
After watching that video I can’t imagine anyone not wanting something fabulous and Elmo like in their house. But, if you are still on the fence, consider the faceless Elmo pendant — still pretty groovy.
Materials:
Not much of a tutorial on this one. The complicated part is figuring out how much tinsel you will need to cover the lantern. That’s all math (read: that’s all you). I can tell you though, that my 9′ of tinsel stretched to cover a lantern with a 10″ diameter. An extra 2′ would have been nice, but I made it work. If you are going to order tinsel garland online, I would order a lot.
Behold! The perfect drag queen pendant lamp.
What? Too much?
Fine. Cut some simple face shapes out of craft foam and attach with hot glue.
Hard part is finding the tinsel in the off-season, but you can find it online. Had I thought ahead of time, I would have stocked up on tinsel after Xmas. How fun would it be to make a dozen of these for a party? I might have to order some gold and green and purple tinsel garland to wrap around lanterns for a Mardi Gras party. Fun!
PS: For all the parents of Elmo fanatics out there, did you know there is an indie film about the heart and soul of Elmo – Kevin Clash? Being Elmo is rolling through theaters right now–you should get a babysitter and take your butt to see it. So cool!
I know, I know, I know.
Yesterday I said I was going to curb my cat lady ways for a while. And you guys, I totally meant it too!
But then, yesterday, I came home and found that my cat was recipient to what might possibly be the coolest package ever.
It’s a pig. And it came priority mail so that means this pig flew.
No brown box or nothing. It came addressed to “Miss Lola” and everything.
And if that was not impressive enough, you know who the pig is from?
To be more precise, a 6 year old Vietnamese Pot-Bellied Pig named Stella Dora Von Swineburg. She has her own blog which you should totally check it out. She is an Artist’s Muse, Fund Raiser and Super Model. So impressive.
As if a pig sending a valentine to a cat wasn’t cool enough, let’s see what was in it, shall we?
Took a while to get this thing going.
It went on for a while. By the time we got the boa out Lola was picking feathers from her teeth.
Then she heard a rattle.
Then there was a mechanical sound.
Then something wiggled.
Uh oh.
For the record, the caterpillar put up a good fight. Not every wind-up toy can withstand the clash of a mighty titan like Lola.
When the battle was won, Lola and I opened a beautiful box of chocolate that also survived the US Postal surface. We decided to call it Survival Chocolate just so it would taste extra good. And it did 🙂
Happy Valentines, Stella!!!
